What happens in an author interview when our resident Court Jester hijacks the train? Come on in and find out!
Where Writers And Authors Meet Interviews:
Q. Kelly was our Featured Spotlight author last week and visitors were encouraged to ask Q. Kelly some of their own questions! Here is a link to that Spotlight! Feel free to ask more questions, and we might just be able to get Kelly back for a follow up interview!
Asked by Sophia DeLuna:
Which of your books was the most fun and which was the most difficult to write?
“Third” was the most fun because it combined several loves of mine: history, British royalty, science fiction and taboo love. This novel came together quickly, in less than three months. Which was the most difficult to write…I couldn’t really say. A few have presented their own challenges, but no novel or work stands out as being the most difficult.
Do you write outlines or do you jump into the story and see where it takes you?
A bit of both. I flesh out story ideas through discussion and usually have a broad outline in my head when I sit to type.
Who is your favorite author?
Humorist Dave Barry is one of my favorite authors, but I don’t write humor (would love to one day). What his writing DID teach me was to think outside the box and to look at situations from different perspectives. So does “MAD” magazine. Another favorite author of mine is Roald Dahl.
Some so-called “bad” authors have influenced me too—to NOT write like them! And many, many authors have a wonderful grasp of language and words that just flow off the page. Their characters and their words come alive. I read books like I breathe air, which is to say I read – A LOT, and so no one author has had time to get his or her tentacles firmly into me!
Questions Asked by Stephen Ward:
When you lost your virginity were you happy or sad?
This may seem stupendous, but I don’t remember my first time. Not because I was drunk or high or whatever, but just because the first time was not memorable. I probably was excited and nervous. Not sad.
What genre of books do you refuse to read?
I’m open to reading ANY genre!
You go to a movie. Do you turn your cell phone off?
Nope. I never have alerts on my phone, but I check it often enough for people to probably think I do have alerts.
A train leaves Baltimore going 60 mph. At the same time, a train leaves Denver going 78 mph. At what point will they crash and send people and cargo scattering about in some hick farmer’s field?
The trains will crash somewhere over Uranus and produce the best zombies known to mankind and alienkind.
What is serendipity?
Sounds like a Little Pony or Care Bear.
Some guy (or girl depending on your sexual orientation, hey, I’m liberal minded) brings you a sampler box of chocolates. What would be your favorite?
You have a cold. Are you grumpy?
I am short, but not so short I qualify as a dwarf. (I am 5 feet 1 3/4th inches tall.)
Do you think numbskulls who can’t write are ruining self-publishing for everyone else?
In a way, yes, but I try to look at situations positively. At least these people make clear what NOT to do.
You get a call from a publisher and they say they like your work, but want you to make enough changes so that your work loses a lot of its bite and heart. Do you sell out for the possibility of money or do you tell them to f–k off?
It depends on how much money. For a certain amount of money, I would do most anything!
While working on a story you find someone else has a book out that has a similar plot to yours. What to do?
That would not stop me one iota. Many stories have the same plot, and part of an author’s job is to put a unique aspect on a “same old, same old” tale.
Out of the blue a long-lost sibling shows up you didn’t know you had. Do you welcome him or her into the family or do you plot his or her demise?
It depends on the personality of the person, but generally, I would welcome a long-lost sibling into the family.
Does it hurt when friends let you down?
Of course it hurts. I’m human, no matter how much I like zombies!
Could you amuse yourself if you were stuck in the middle of a desert?
Sure. I’d go swimming.
Could you ever work for the government?
I would love to be a super-secret CIA spy. Maybe I already am and don’t know it!
You are offered a pet but must pick among three: a dog, cat or Gila monster. Which one?
I would let them duke it out to determine the winner. My money would be on the cat. These claws do wonders.
Someone buys your book and then e-mails you a bunch of questions about the plot that are clearly answered in your story. Do you reply?
Sure, I’d reply with the wrong answers. 😉
You are invited to a party and go, but it turns into an orgy. Do you stay?
My wife told me not to answer this one. (Secret answer: Yes! I’d stay.)
You are in the dairy section. Some other customer’s little child has managed to open the top of a milk carton and poured the contents all over the floor. Several people walk into it and slip and slide all over the place. An old lady falls flats on her ass as does the child’s mother. Do you laugh hysterically, take off in the other direction or seek help?
The more the merrier, so I would open and pour at least six more milk cartons.
Do you take shit from illiterate morons?
I only take pee from them.
From Admin Virginia: Oh my… I am laughing so hard! My absolute favorite was the part about e-mailing the wrong answers to questions asked about your book!
You can find Q Kelly’s Book‘s on Amazon here